My Geek Baby

In an earlier post (Sept. 15) I wrote about Sophie Currier’s struggle to complete her medical final exam due to time constraints — she had to go to court and won more time to pump breast milk during the nine-hour test. A Massachusetts appeals court judge ruled in her favor yesterday.

“Ms. Currier said the ruling was a boon ‘for nursing mothers who are trying to juggle family obligations and further their careers’” a NY Times article reported.

Go Sophie!

Babble has an interesting post about parenting coaches; people hired to help kids learn everything from potty training to riding a bike but I wonder if this is taking away from the role of the um, well, parent? Granted, I would hire a lactation consultant if needed, and the idea of someone giving me reliable tips to get baby to sleep after a restless week of no sleep but some of these coaches sound like paid parents. Isn’t there something to be said for the first-time parents who get through the brutal phases of childhood with both them and their kids learning a lot about what NOT to do as well as what works? I understand that many parents need childcare and nannies who may help potty train their child but paying someone to help the kid ride a bike? I wonder in this scenario: where is the parent when the kid is taking the training wheels off? What if the kid falls off the bike and skins his knee after the bike teacher leaves? Shouldn’t you want the kid to look to YOU to help them through this? What’s next? A bedtime story reading, boogie-monster removal service, “Ghostbusters for tots?”

During the many conversations that Jake and I had when considering when to start a family, the question of “how do we afford this?” came up again and again. We both currently work (I’m a writer and he’s a network engineer) but there’s not a financial “leader” among the two of us. We talk. We save. We worry. But like most people, I imagine we’ll figure it out as we did when we bought our house a few years ago, which was scarier for us than committing to marriage. So along the way, we’ve created a savings plan and started contributing to it before Baby Davis was a reality. And in four months, she will arrive.

So, in thinking about savings and whatnot, I’ve decided to write out some of my current savings tricks and would like to hear from readers what they do to save up for vacations, kids, college, cars and retirement.

How I save:

1. Drive a 9-year-old stick-shift VW that gets good gas mileage and uses regular gas.
2. Work from home once a week (saving gas and lunch money).
3. Gave up highlights and go for a haircut every two-three months.
4. Cut Jake’s hair.
5. Eat in and cook most nights.
6. Rent movies more than see them in the theater.
7. Put money into savings and a retirement fund (automatically) each month.
8. Keep windows open until it is unbearably hot or cold.
9. Shut off lights when I leave a room (thanks Mom and Dad!).
10. Cut coupons from Sunday’s paper and use them before I lose them.

How do you save?

For several weeks I have been feeling flutters and fishbowl swimming and actual kicks. I kept trying to show Jake but baby girl was acting like the top-hat-wearing Michigan J. Frog who debuted in “One Froggy Evening,” dancing only for her audience of one. Until last night. She gave a high kick that could be felt and seen across the room.

And without further adieu, she might as well have been singing these lryics.

Hello, my baby!
Hello, my honey!
Hello, my ragtime gal!

Send me a kiss by wire.
Baby, my heart’s on fire!

If you refuse me,
Honey, you lose me.
Then you’ll be left alone.

Oh baby, telephone
And tell me I’m
Your own!

Exercise guidelines according to the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists:

Avoid the following during the second and third trimester:

Basketball
Soccer
In-line Skating
Downhill Skiing
Horseback Riding
Ice Hockey
Gymnastics
Racquet sports

Also out as soon as you find out you’re carrying a mini me:
Scuba Diving

I’m guessing hang gliding is also out for now…

The National Institute of Child Health and Human Development, an arm of the National Institutes of Health (NIH) recently awarded $30 million to four research centers to study what some call the “fourth grade slump” where a split divides students who excel at reading with those who struggle. The term–attributed to the late Jeanne S. Chall, a professor and educational psychologist at Harvard University’s graduate school of education–is used to describe the grade where reading goes beyond basic decoding into more fluency of texts and comprehension of the written word, according to a recent article on edweek.org.

Solving reading difficulties early is critical to help struggling students catch up to their classmates, but unfortunately many never do. Research centers at the University of Colorado at Boulder, Florida State University, University of Houston, and the Baltimore-based Kennedy Krieger Institute, will participate in the studies of children with learning disabilities and reading comprehension issues. Although each center will have a unique look at the issues, all intend to develop solutions that can be used in the classroom setting.

University of Colorado at Boulder
Researchers to ID and characterize reading disabilities and ADHD. A twin and sibling study will follow students from elementary school through high school, looking at the role of genetics and the environment.

Florida State University
Researchers to compare approaches for defining, classifying, and preventing learning disabilities affecting decoding, reading comprehension, spelling, and written composition. They will also analyze the response-to-intervention (RTI) approach.

Kennedy Krieger Institute
Researchers to study the neurobiology and behavior of children with reading disabilities, and the effect of disabilities such as ADHD on reading.

University of Houston
Researchers to develop interventions to prevent learning disabilities in young studenets and to remediate such disabilities in older students, while investigating the neurobiology of learning disabilities and how the brain’s response changes with intervention.

SOURCE: National Institute of Child Health and Human Development

Many years of hard work, sweat and tears have no doubt gone into the potential medical degree for Sophie Currier. But now, as a nursing mother of a four-month-old, breast milk, or the need to pump said milk, may stand in the way of her being able to complete the Harvard medical exam during the allotted time, according to a recent New York Times article.

Ms. Currier requested more time than the standard 45 minutes allotted for breaks during the nine-hour test in order to express milk, eat lunch and also use the restroom but she has not yet received the approval for the extra time beyond being told that she would be allowed to use one of the empty exam rooms to pump (all of which may be monitored through one-way glass). The National Board of Medical Examiners has so far refused her request for extra time and so Ms. Currier asked a Mass. Superior Court judge to step in and order that she get extra time and also a private room with a power outlet.

It is sort of ironic that the American Academy of Pediatrics is pushing breast feeding as the best nutrition for newborn and young babies and this woman is just one of many trying to get her medical degree. She has already taken the exam once, while eight months pregnant, and failed by a few points, so the pressure is mounting to take, and pass the test. Ms. Currier is scheduled to take the test today, and if she passes, already has an offer from Massachusetts General Hospital as one of their clinical pathology residents. She does research on dyslexia and attention deficit hyper activity disorder. Let’s hope for the best.

It is probably obvious to say that it was a lot easier naming my cats, Miles and Bartleby, than is has been trying to select a name for Baby Davis. For a while, and before it was a she, we referred to the baby as Seamus, in homage of both of our Irish roots and because well, it’s a fun name. But being an ethnic mutt, comprised of Czech, Irish, English, Welsh and and a pinch of Cherokee, we have had a lot of background to cover if we want to name our child something that has a reference to our heritage. But after reading through three baby naming books, I’m ready to throw tradition out the window in an effort to find the perfect name. One that has a nice sound, is easy to pronounce and may not leave room for an easy nickname. Why, you ask? Well my name is Lauren and for most of my life I went by Laurie, but most people don’t understand that one is a nickname for the other. And for some reason Laurie is hard to pronounce. Lori, Lawry, Laura are all typical ways to say alternatives to my name. I have grown into using my given name, Lauren, and was named that because my mom loves Lauren Bacall. And that’s how baby naming should go. Parents who have a positive association with a name, or love the way it sounds should go with that. Interestingly, Lauren Bacall isn’t Lauren at all. Brought into the world as Betty Joan Perske, and like many actresses, changed it.

There are so many things to consider when naming a child. What she will be called on the playground. I was almost named April, for the month I was born, but my parents smartly realized that my loving but smart-mouth brothers would have immediately shortened my name to Ape. I liked the name Sukey, which is an easy rhyme for “pukey” so we’re reconsidering. And that’s the only peek inside the name game that Jake and I have been playing. We’ll announce the name when baby girl arrives.

I went to junior high with a boy named Harley Davidson (Last Name omitted). Even in eighth grade I thought that was a big name for a little kid. And he was short and scrawny so he had a pretty big attitude. It didn’t help him any that his very odd older brother was nicknamed “Birdman” for reasons unknown to me.

If you’re considering naming your kid something weird as a social experiment, check out the section in “Freakonomics” on names. A family who named their two sons “Winner” and “Loser” seemed to be setting them up for a lifetime of difficulties. Ironically, or because they were fighting stereotypes based on their names from day one, or might have just switched names after becoming adults. “Winner” found himself in jail and “Loser” excelled and now has a very successful adult life.

One odd thing that Jake came across in reading “Beyond Jennifer and Jason, Madison and Montana” was this statistic: people with unfortunate monogram letters, P.O.O. or D.U.M., actually live one to two years less than their better monogrammed counterparts. So it adds another dimension to the name game, and for some, possibly more anxiety.

The book also says that women tend to veer towards the unusual, “How about Starshine?” while men typically stick with tradition. Luckily for us, we’re both on the same page with finding that right blend of uncommon without veering into freakland. The kid is going to be stuck with this name until they are old enough to legally change it, so we’re trying to find something that we, and later, she, likes.

For many people becoming an adult is measured in milestones – signing up for a retirement account, making a roast in a crockpot, or buying a home. But for me, gentle readers, it is in the purchase of a rocker recliner, and let me tell you. I love this thing. Knit me an afghan and call me Granny, I’m home!

I am declining to name the company where we bought it, I’m not endorsing them or anything but let’s just say it rhymes with CrazyToy. I innocently went into this warehouse store recently, just for a look-see, and if I had simply stayed on my feet, I could have swept through the store without whipping out my credit card. But take heed to this warning; if you sit you will buy something. Possibly something ugly but SO COMFORTABLE. This company has come a long way in terms of style and once I started sitting on the recliners, I was simply finished. Done. Cooked. And luckily, because they have made major improvements in style and size, mine is both comfy and approximately half the size of the football recliners of my youth.

What does this quasi-commercial have to do with kids and their intelligence? A lot. This rocker is going to log many hours rocking, comforting and providing a lounging nap place for baby girl and me and baby girl and her dad. Her comfort can only be beneficial for her emotional stability and create a cozy environment from which to read books and sing songs. Put simply, come January, we will be ready to rock! It’s a variation on a theme, seeing how Jake is actually a rocker, playing bass in a post-punk band, Scanner Freaks but I don’t think this next step toward parenthood takes away any of his street cred.